suein56
Member
Southern Morbihan 56 Brittany
Posts: 7,568
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Post by suein56 on Oct 16, 2023 16:11:10 GMT 1
This is an article about picking up German customs and losing some UK customs.
Like the writer of the article I was used to apologising in the vague way people do (or did) in the UK. Even when there is nothing to apologise for. Learning to lose this has taken time.
I also learned to say 'no, I'd rather not, but thank you anyway' when I didn't really want to do smthg.
The article reminded me how grateful I am I came to live in France.
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Post by specsavers2 on Oct 16, 2023 16:19:32 GMT 1
Interesting wee article. It certainly makes you think!
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Post by cernunnos on Oct 16, 2023 17:21:20 GMT 1
I read the article this morning.I had always wondered why the brits apologised for everything when they didn't actualy mean it. Having had my formative years outside of the UK , I have not aquired this habit , or if I had , have lost it. Still makes me smile sometimes.
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Veem
Member
Posts: 12,030
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Post by Veem on Oct 16, 2023 18:51:02 GMT 1
What really amuses me is the 'I'm sorry but ..............' followed by all the reasons why you don't feel sorry. You simply disagree.
Eg I'm sorry, but if he will go out in the car and get drunk, he should expect to be arrested for drunk driving.
Edit. For 'amuses' read 'irritates me intensely'!
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Post by houpla on Oct 16, 2023 18:53:22 GMT 1
The flip side of the coin is the French refusal to apologise even when they're blatantly in the wrong. I don't find that admirable at all.
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Post by Nutty on Oct 16, 2023 19:57:17 GMT 1
The English habit of saying sorry at opportune moments is nothing but a verbal tic.. and it's completely harmless.
It's like saying "How do you do.." when meeting someone. The last thing you want to hear is ".. well, I've got this spasm in my right leg.."
I don't miss much about England but I do miss many of those little courtesies that take the edge off modern life - especially the one that houpla mentions above! There are manners here - and lots of them - but they don't necessarily overlap with ours.
However, despite the above, moving to France was the best move we ever made too.
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Post by glazedallover on Oct 16, 2023 20:56:11 GMT 1
I don't know, it's not a lot different from living in France and having to say 'bonjour' to complete strangers every day even though you don't mean it, and they probably hate your guts ....Bonjour ? What do you mean Bon bloody jour you "é&ç!ng :é§)@. I'll give you bonjour......
its been a bad day.
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Post by Nutty on Oct 16, 2023 21:35:31 GMT 1
" Sorry..!"
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Post by robertarthur on Oct 16, 2023 23:08:36 GMT 1
Asterix in Britain, the authors received no complaints fom the Britons regarding the book.
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Post by cernunnos on Oct 17, 2023 8:33:45 GMT 1
I don't know, it's not a lot different from living in France and having to say 'bonjour' to complete strangers every day even though you don't mean it, and they probably hate your guts ....Bonjour ? What do you mean Bon bloody jour you "é&ç!ng :é§)@. I'll give you bonjour...... its been a bad day. Yup , it is a good way of picking out the Brits , they don't say anything when they arrive, but when they leave they say Sorry ! History repeats itself ?
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Post by cernunnos on Oct 17, 2023 8:34:40 GMT 1
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Aardvark
Non-gamer
Living in soggy 22 and still wondering what's going on.
Posts: 2,172
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Post by Aardvark on Oct 17, 2023 10:02:41 GMT 1
An interesting and thought provoking article. I had a semester of "Speech and Drama" back in school and the tutor also had a degree in German. He often gave us a few examples of the subtleties of language and pointed out the literal and very logical translations of German words. One that sticks in my mind is "car" = "vagen" "sick" = "krank" so it follows that "ambulance" = "Krankenwagen" Can anyone guess what "hospital" might be? Send your answers to Steve Barclay.
I have a gut feeling I would have done better with language if I had ended up in Germany rather than France. My French teacher back then spoke slowly but then I found the French sound as if they're on speed. Unfathomable to me for the most part.
When met with the (English) greeting "How do you do, I am tempted to reply with "How do I do what?".
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Nifty
Member
Posts: 5,046
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Post by Nifty on Oct 17, 2023 10:12:56 GMT 1
The English habit of saying sorry at opportune moments is nothing but a verbal tic.. and it's completely harmless. and means nothing, in as much as it means so much. By chance as I wrote this my oh just passed me a birthday card to sign. The first line began ‘ I am sorry but …. i suppose that is a literal tic
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Post by annabellespapa on Oct 17, 2023 11:14:08 GMT 1
Us Brits smile to much when abroad, a French man warned me many years ago when looking at houses to not smile and if anything look disinterested so to give the impression of indifference.
The flip side to that is we have many French neighbours who just pop by as the know they will receive a warm welcome (and they tell us that), as it contrasts to the formality and etiquette of their normal French life.
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Aardvark
Non-gamer
Living in soggy 22 and still wondering what's going on.
Posts: 2,172
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Post by Aardvark on Oct 17, 2023 11:18:34 GMT 1
The English habit of saying sorry at opportune moments is nothing but a verbal tic.. and it's completely harmless. and means nothing, in as much as it means so much. By chance as I wrote this my oh just passed me a birthday card to sign. The first line began ‘ I am sorry but …. i suppose that is a literal tic I would respond that perhaps it was a polite apology up front that the message the card conveys could be misunderstood and cause offense. So many people in this new "woke" world choose to be offended by what would have been either insignificant or merely amusing a few years ago.
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