Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2021 6:35:35 GMT 1
French children and grandchildren have a legal responsability to look after their parents. My partner is one of four children whose mother has recently gone into an EPHAD or old people’s home. Her mother was previously living with one of the children in a rented accommodation for many years with the two other children in close proximity. My partner has been ‘estranged’ ( can’t think of a better word) from her mother for thirty years following a bust-up. She has had no contact with her whatsoever. My partner has three children scattered around France, about three months ago she received a call from a daughter who had been in constant contact with her grandmother , who had received a letter from a court asking for contact details of my partner. My partner was then sent forms to fill on for a judge to assess how much her and her three children should pay as a contribution based on their respective incomes etc. The judge sent the results of his findings which included a list of what each child of the mother , including respective children should pay monthly to cover the EPHAD fees. My partner plus children aren’t happy about having to pay for someone they have almost no contact with but the law is the law. I think the system is fair when asking for the children etc to pay for the care of their parents.
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Post by hereford on Jul 16, 2021 8:48:42 GMT 1
Yes, indeed, that is how it works here. My mother was in an EHPAD and we had to pay towards it. I think it is right, too. People keep telling me it "wouldn't have happened in the UK" - but I know that in fact that many families have to top-up fees where the council payment is not enough. Even estranged children get to inherit - so it is fair that they pay too!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2021 9:53:45 GMT 1
Yes, indeed, that is how it works here. My mother was in an EHPAD and we had to pay towards it. I think it is right, too. People keep telling me it "wouldn't have happened in the UK" - but I know that in fact that many families have to top-up fees where the council payment is not enough. Even estranged children get to inherit - so it is fair that they pay too!
Yes, quite agree. In our case or in her case the fees are actually split between the four children plus the ten or so grandchildren, depending on their means. My partner and I aren’t married or ‘pacsed’ so I’m not liable.
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Post by woolybanana on Jul 16, 2021 11:34:49 GMT 1
Out of interest and theoretically, why should the younger generation be responsible for their parents and even grandparents. What is it about birth that means they should have to take on the debts etc of their elders, a potential rope rounds their necks forever?
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Post by Dominic Best on Jul 16, 2021 11:38:06 GMT 1
I’m sure that you wouldn’t want the taxpayer to pay for their care so what’s left? Euthanasia?
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Post by Jo in France on Jul 16, 2021 11:40:33 GMT 1
I can’t see anyone paying for me! I have only myself to rely on. But I REALLY object to them getting anything I have left to leave!
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Post by hereford on Jul 16, 2021 11:42:37 GMT 1
Oddly none of my mother's four grandchildren were asked to fill in a form or contribute and yet all are aged 40 plus. It does not matter where the "children" live but perhaps in our case the grandchildren were spared because there are two in the UK, one in Germany and one in Québec! They certainly chase actual children wherever they live.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2021 14:43:13 GMT 1
I’m sure that you wouldn’t want the taxpayer to pay for their care so what’s left? Euthanasia? Yes! Then the grandparents can look after themselves.
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Post by tim17 on Jul 16, 2021 17:18:13 GMT 1
This is why I think the French way is flawed.
My stepchildren have only seen their biological father twice since in the last 20 years and now have no contact with him whatsoever, assuming this situation continues why the hell should they pay for his care in old age when he abandoned them?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2021 17:32:29 GMT 1
This is why I think the French way is flawed. My stepchildren have only seen their biological father twice since in the last 20 years and now have no contact with him whatsoever, assuming this situation continues why the hell should they pay for his care in old age when he abandoned them? Because it’s the law.
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Post by mangetout on Jul 16, 2021 17:39:11 GMT 1
Does the French law take into account children that were abandoned by their parents?
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Post by tim17 on Jul 16, 2021 17:52:36 GMT 1
This is why I think the French way is flawed. My stepchildren have only seen their biological father twice since in the last 20 years and now have no contact with him whatsoever, assuming this situation continues why the hell should they pay for his care in old age when he abandoned them? Because it’s the law. So laws can't be wrong or need changing then Peter?
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suein56
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Southern Morbihan 56 Brittany
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Post by suein56 on Jul 16, 2021 17:57:50 GMT 1
This is why I think the French way is flawed. My stepchildren have only seen their biological father twice since in the last 20 years and now have no contact with him whatsoever, assuming this situation continues why the hell should they pay for his care in old age when he abandoned them? This imposition can be challenged in certain circumstances .. IIRC abandonment is one of the reasons, but I can't remember the details or give a legal link.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2021 18:08:46 GMT 1
Does the French law take into account children that were abandoned by their parents? A child is a child for purposes of French law. My partner is a child of this lady in the EPHAD who hasn’t had contact with her for getting on for thirty years. My partner detests her mother and is very angry she has to pay but doesn’t have a choice. She is even more angry that her three kids have to chip in.The calculations are based on means tested income etc with some of the grandchildren deemed not to earn enough to pay. Décisions can be appealed though she was told it would cost her about €4000 for the privilege with the possibility of no change in the decision.
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Post by Jo in France on Jul 16, 2021 18:40:32 GMT 1
What about parents abandoned by their children!
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